Have you ever been introduced to someone new or have been in a very lively conversation whether one on one or in a group setting and you suddenly asked a question and was met with an awkward silence? 🔇
This is a little sequel to the blog post the rules of society, however, the rules offered here in comparison to its former focus on the practical modern society, a lot of which surprisingly aren’t obvious sense to some people. Nevertheless, that’s where this post comes into play.
No one likes to feel awkward at the social stage, most people would rather coil themselves up in a blanket at stay at home than be in a position that makes them feel awkward.
Generally, I myself would rather just do the same!
Nonetheless, being human, a fully functioning one, it is almost impossible to avoid getting social at some point, for we are at the end of social beings. Regardless, we do not have to place ourselves at the position of the social quirk, these are 5 subjects in which you should generally avoid in a conversation in order not to put either you nor the person in which your emphasis is directed to in an uncomfortable position.
5 Cricket sound inducing questions 🦗
How old are you?:
it doesn’t matter if you are asking a man or a woman this question, most people are generally quite touchy when it comes to questions about their age. I would say that one of the reasons why people are generally sensitive about such a question is because as society tends to prize youth, the older one gets, the more likely they are to become sensitive about it. Nevertheless, never ask a person who is over the age of 18 how old they are.
Have you gained weight?:
unless you are in a society that prizes weight gain as a sign of wealth and luxury, avoid this question like the plague, in fact, to be on the safer side it is generally better to avoid such questions.
I live in a society which prizes a more meaty body, however, due to my personal preference, I value the slender body more, because of this, I always get a tad bit offended when anyone says I look fatter or asked if I’ve gained any weight.
No one wants to hear that they are chunky, even if they know it. It is always much worse if someone else points out the obvious! Not everyone has the capability to stay thin always, while some people may have gained weight through emotional eating and other vices because they are heartbroken or depressed, some people might also be suffering from some ailment like diabetes, or something which has made them larger than they were, and their newfound size may be a constant reminder of their problems. In our modern times, pointing out a weight gain might be the most insensitive thing you can do in society.
Are you pregnant?: this one is in the direct link to question number 2. Women particularly from age 30 and above start to easily add on more inches to the waistline. I personally, in my early 20s tend to get a larger waistline whenever I am stressed or depressed. Even though most of the time the increased size is not really as a result of me overindulging, I still get sensitive about it.
The biggest problem with asking someone if they are pregnant is if the answer is negative. Ouch.
We all know that pregnancy is a beautiful thing, but if someone is pregnant let them bring it up, let them talk about it first even when they are very pregnant and the baby bump is impossible not to notice. Asking if someone if they are pregnant when they are not, is just cruel, especially when the larger belly might be as a result of them being obese. This is four-step worse than asking if someone had gained weight. How do you think that person might feel? Knowing that they have gotten so fat that people think they are expecting?
Why are you still single? When are you getting married? When are you having any kids?
This is my take is one of the most stupid, most annoying questions on the planet, yet most people think it is normal or appropriate for them to ask people such questions. You do not know the rationale for why such a person has not been able to find love, nor do you know how sad and lonely that person may be feeling as a consequence. The same also goes for asking people why or when they are going to have kids. Perhaps the woman is barren or the husband impotent, or they have one underlying medical issues that keep them up at night. Sometimes what we think are just innocent, harmless questions might just be that one reminder enough to push another over the edge.
Unfortunately, this is a very common behavior for people, whether it’s online, or in person,
people are constantly trying to pry into other people’s agenda or private lives and it can really be unfair to the other person who has underlying issues behind why they haven’t been able to do certain things.
People should really be careful of the kind of questions or topic they bring up in a conversation because you do not know what exactly keeps that person up at night. As ever, it is always best to let people give rise to a topic, this means that they are open and willing to talk about a certain thing even though it hurts or worry them, it is safer that way to you and the other person, as this prevents you from bringing something up that may end up straining such relationship.