Every girl at some point in time has dreamed of becoming a Princess, Disney has successfully sold every single girl child that somehow it is possible for every single one of us to not just live in a castle, and with our prince charming, but that we can really get that elusive “happily ever after”
I spent most of my childhood days lost in fantasies created by the sort of cartoons I watch. Barbie was also one of my favorites, and my god did I fell in love with ballet as a result. To this day, even way after outgrowing my obsessions with fairy tales, I still love ballet and other forms of dance like classical, contemporary and pop. hip hop? not so much…. sometimes I wonder if my attraction to music and the performing arts was as a result of the programming I gave to my subconscious as a child or if I truly, really I’m in love with it. but I learned from Jordan Peterson, the Canadian phycologist and philosopher that more often than not, what naturally interests us is way beyond our conscious control. no matter what, I cannot shake off the visceral feeling I get when I hear or see such things, it is almost primal. growing up in my ghetto neighborhood as an African child, the community tends to place a ceiling or limitation on what a black person can and cannot do. you have to love certain things, shun some others, and behave a certain way or you will be accused of trying to be white and being “all that”. But yet again this is not peculiar to the black community only, every community tends to have a set of standards and norms that are considered acceptable as a member of such group, this is what makes human beings social. It is quite hard for the brain to comprehend too much contrast all at once. Nevertheless, this comes with a price as often people’s individuality tends to be mutilated in the face of society’s need for consistency and order.
Shattering existing social barriers has not been easy for me, but yet to really feel alive I have to accept and become all that I am, irrespective of if my authentic self is acceptable by society. Everyone has that particular thing in which they derive so much pleasure from, so much satisfaction from that even for that fleeting moment when we are truly ourselves, that sensation makes time disappear as we become lost in the tranquil. We become beautiful. I don’t want to have this feeling for just a fleeting moment, only to be crushed by the rather depressing feeling of being restricted and contained. I want to live passionately not just sometime in the future, but today, now, every day. You know you have found your ” sweet spot” when fame or fortune does not make the base of your inspiration or motive. Only then will you ultimately wear that crown majesty, as you face the world with ruthless confidence.